Hi. I’m Cora. Want to be best friends and roomies?

I’m a 1.5 year old female Mountain Mix. I don’t know what that means but people tell me I’m adorable and it sounds like that’s a good thing? I know I’m young, but I’m very mature for my age. People say that a lot and you probably have whiplash from the last 18 or 19-year-old girl you rented a room to who promised she was mature beyond her years while also complaining about how Sapphire, Tiff, and Jules totally went out without her last night.

Full stop: I’m a gentle, old soul who loves nothing more than a night in with sweatpants and a cuddle buddy (that’s you!). I’m very laid back, very quiet – just ask my current roommate. You’ll never have to worry about me playing my music too loud or bringing people over at weird hours of the night.

I don’t drink. I don’t party. Pugs > drugs.

I don’t have thumbs, so I can’t cook. I also can’t help you with the dishes, but I don’t eat people food, so you’ll never have to worry about me sneaking into the fridge in the middle of the night and finishing off your pizza.

I’ll also never hog the bathroom (cause, like, I go outside, LOL) and I don’t require regularly scheduled showers. I don’t care if you hog the TV or binge watch Gilmore Girls – just so long as I can snuggle with you and we can agree that Jess was the best boyfriend Rory had.

Not to sound like a diva, but I’d prefer if your home had a fenced yard. It’s a long story and a bit embarrassing, but loud noises kind of freak me out. Now would be a good time for me to explain a little bit more about my past, I guess…

I just got out of a violent past. So, I’d prefer my roommate, or main person of contact, to be female. It’s not that I don’t like men, or that I’m mean to them. I’m just healing right now and need a safe space to learn how to be myself again. So please don’t be offended if you bring your boyfriend over and I ignore him – it’s not him, it’s me.

I come with practically nothing! So you don’t have to worry about moving furniture around or finding your measuring tape to see if we can add another bookshelf to your already crowded living room (LOL, cause I don’t read so I don’t have books, hence, no bookshelf). The only baggage I come with is the emotional kind. Ha. Get it?

I’m not picky. I like my home to come with a roof, four walls, and maybe a couch to shelter me from the elements. Everything else that comes with the place is a convenient bonus! All that is important to me I’ve comprised into a basic list, below:

Important to me:

-You’re pro dog

-You’re nice

-You have a fenced yard

Not so important to me:

-Your cleanliness level

-The long hours you spend in the bathroom

-The inordinate amount of time you spend on the couch

-If you’re Vegan/Vegetarian/Omnivore

Oh, it’d be cool if you were there, too from time to time – I don’t need you there all the time, just like, to open the door (again, no thumbs) so I can get outside, tell me I’m pretty, rub my belly, etc. In return, I’ll be there for you, through the good and the bad. I’ll be the best roommate you’ve ever had and then some.

I think I’m pretty awesome (the people I’m couch surfing with do, too) but I just thought it was worth mentioning here. Just in case you were worried about my levels of awesomeness, don’t be. I’m 10/10 awesome. 11/10 cute.

I cannot talk, but I can listen. And I listen very well! I’ll never deflect the course of our conversation with a comment or gripe of my own life. How can my life be bad? I’m with you! 

But don’t take my word for it! Here is what some of my current and past friends/roommates had to say about me:

“Cora is a lovebug! She wants to be wherever I am. She loves you at 110%.” – Michelle

“I wish I lived with Cora because she is super easy to be around!” – Anonymous

“She is to die for. She just wants to play and run around and be a happy dog. You can see her slowly coming out of her shell everyday.” – Jill

“Cora is the best roommate – she knows how to have fun but also when to give you your personal space. She doesn’t judge. She’s just there!” – Julianne

 “So reliable, so trustworthy. A complete sweetheart and friend to the end. My soul sister.” – Leigh

 

If any of this sounds at all appealing to you, if I’ve sold you on my levels of awesomeness, we should talk. I don’t have Facebook, Instagram. I also don’t have an email, or a phone. And you can’t do a credit check on me because I don’t have a credit card.

But.

If you want a next-level roommate who will share your low-key love of bacon, adventure, friendship; if you want someone who will drop everything on their plate, even if it has bacon on it, to be with you; if you want a loyal friend who will listen, be kind, and there, then where have you been all my life?